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The adoption option

By Diane Griffith, Staff Writer, myOptumHealth

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When you long to start a family, finding out you're unable to have children is heartbreaking news. You may decide to re-examine your goals and pursue a future without children. Or you may consider adoption.

Infertility isn't the only reason people choose to adopt. Some couples want to give a permanent home to a child who is in foster care. Some single men, single women and same-sex couples also elect to start a family this way. No matter what your reason may be, learn what to expect if you decide you want to adopt a child.

Types of adoption

You can adopt a baby through a licensed adoption agency or work with a lawyer to adopt privately. You may decide to adopt an older child who is in foster care, or a child from a foreign country. No matter which option you choose, you will need a qualified adoption lawyer to represent your rights.

If you are adopting a newborn, you can choose between an open or closed adoption. With open adoption, you agree to stay in touch with the birth parents and usually let them have contact with your child. These terms are worked out between you and the birth parents.

If you choose a closed adoption, the birth parents will know nothing about you. The only thing you will be told is the medical history of each parent. This information should be kept with your child's health records.

Giving open access to the birth parents may not be right for you. But you may still want them to have some type of involvement. If so, you can opt for a "semi-open" adoption. In this case, a mediator keeps the birth parents informed about the child's progress. Birth parents may receive cards, letters and photos, but there is no direct contact.

Adoption costs

Depending on which type of adoption you choose, fees can range from $0 to $40,000 and sometimes more:

• Agency adoptions: From $5,000 to $40,000
• Independent adoptions: From $8,000 to $40,000
• Foster care adoptions: From $0 to $2,500
• Intercountry adoptions: From $7,000 to $30,000

These fees usually include your home study (an interview and evaluation at your home by a social worker). It also includes travel expenses, legal fees and court costs. Infant adoption fees often include the medical, legal and living expenses of the birth mother. Some states, though, restrict this type of reimbursement.

Financial help

There are many programs that can help you with the costs of adoption. They include tax credits, loans, grants and subsidies. Many companies reimburse their employees for some adoption expenses.

When a special needs child is adopted, some states reimburse the adoptive parents for adoption fees. Children with special needs may include those who are older or disabled. They may belong to minority groups or need to be placed with siblings. Many of these children are in foster care.

When the birth mother changes her mind

Until the adoption becomes permanent, the birth mother will have time to reconsider. If she changes her mind, you will have to return the baby to her. This is a real possibility, and is something you must consider when deciding whether or not to adopt a baby. Make sure to find out which fees, if any, will be reimbursed if the birth mother changes her mind. Note that there is a time limit, 6 months in some states, after which she cannot by law be permitted to interfere with your adoption. Your lawyer can outline this potential occurrence in detail.

Just because your plans to have a "traditional" family didn't work out, that doesn't mean your dreams of having children have to end. With some alteration in your original goals, you can still provide a happy, loving home for a special child.

View the original The adoption option article on myOptumHealth.com 

SOURCES:

• American Academy of Pediatrics. Q&A: adoption.

• American Academy of Family Physicians. What is an adoption plan?